My fate in life seems to be helping women around my age navigate the online dating world. And here’s the one secret I always reveal to them.
It. is. so. much. fun.
I’m tired of hearing people bemoan that meeting people this way is any different from meeting them any other way. Or that it’s not as good. Because really, it isn’t.
It’s BETTER. And here are three reasons why online dating is better than traditional dating:
1.Online dating sites expose you to potentially suitable dates you’d never meet in your day-to-day world. And more of them. Maybe you work with the wrong gender, or in a tiny company, or by yourself. Maybe you don’t belong to a church or social group. What’s wrong with taking steps to meet new men or women you ordinarily wouldn’t encounter? I’d applaud you. And mid-life women? Get over the thought that online dating makes you a loser. It’s just not true. Everyone does it, and this is the reason why.
The other day, someone complained “try meeting someone through words on a screen.” As if that were a bad thing. Here’s a news flash–it’s one of the best ways to get to know someone. Oh, you say you “hate the dating process?” I hear that all the time. I hate to break it to you: Prince or Princess Charming doesn’t just magically appear. You actually do have to date. Nothing is assured–not with traditional dating or online.
I found dating to be way fun. Men of all kinds were open and available. For the most part–more on that later. I went out with a pilot, an engineer, an IT guy, a lawyer, a doctor, a professional chess player, a cop, a corporate executive–just to name a few. I learned something from each one and some are still friends today.
2. Online dating tells you a lot more a lot earlier than any other way of getting acquainted. If you understand how to navigate the world of online dating–how to read a profile, what’s between the lines and how to proceed—chances are you’ll know everything necessary to determine if you want to take it further. Or not.
The member’s profile tells you a little about their interests and what they’re looking for–so you don’t waste your time. You’ll know if s/he is articulate and can spell. You’ll know how open they are, for good or for bad. If you read between the lines, you’ll know way more than that. Words on a screen are a GREAT way to initiate a conversation.
Oh, you think it’s to much work? Get over it. It’s always a lot of work–think about the “kissing a lot of frogs before meeting your prince” adage. Did you think there was a shortcut? Nope. No shortcut. Invest a little quality time in your own profile and in assessing others—and you’re likely to find some quality dates.
3. You just might meet someone you like. You aren’t going to meet them sitting around bemoaning your single status. Or complaining about how hard it is to meet someone nice online. It’s actually pretty easy. You just have to choose well. Yes, there are bad experiences, every online dater has them and so did I. But there really is a secret to minimizing the bad stuff and getting to the good stuff more quickly.
So what’s the secret to successful online dating? First, it’s to have a positive attitude. And then? I’ll tell you in a future post.