I’m always taken aback when I encounter a squat-style toilet in Europe. Like I did today, at lunch. It raises all sorts of questions I don’t want to even record here.

The squat toilet must reflect the European man’s fantasy that women walk around in dresses without panties.

Because the alternative is to strip from the waist down to pee.

Which I had to do today.

Without that nice paper drape they give you at the gynecologist.

Which is the only other time you undress from the waist down for an event that isn’t meant to be pleasurable.