Every five weeks I’d sit in my colorist’s chair and ask “how much grey do I have now? Is it pure grey, silver or salt and pepper? Is it time to go gray?”
With only a quarter inch of growth, It was always hard for her to tell. After all, I’d had highlights and some base color for decades. But she’d pull back the hair on the back side of my head, where my natural color still mostly remained, and say, “Still a lot of dark brown!”
I’ve always looked longingly at friends with beautiful silver manes who still looked youthful (and sometimes actually still were). I wanted that look. But even as I approach 70 (in a bit over a year) it seemed like salt and pepper would be my fate.
I don’t like salt and pepper. I think it’s aging. More aging than beautiful silver locks.
“You could grow it out a while and see,” my colorist suggested. I considered it. “Not yet,” was my response. Every month. Even as I scrolled Instagram feeds called Grombre and Silver Liberation.
Now, though, it’s been several months since I’ve had color. My highlights and color –and roots—are growing out and I’m beginning to get a clearer picture of what lies beneath.
My temples are pretty silver and a pretty silver. I have a silver or white streak on my left top side of my head. There is enough white or silver to see that I am definitely going that way in patches. Patches. But the rest of it? Still largely brown with that salt and pepper look.
Every morning I examine my roots in the mirror and consider whether or not I want to let my color go au naturel. After all, in a crazy. moment a few years back I bought a really nice wig. I could wear it until my locks were all the same color(s). It’s an option.
As the roots grow out framing my face in silver, I don’t even recognize myself. This week, in particular, the contrast is stark. So I looked and looked. Parted my hair this way and that and looked some more. And finally, came to my conclusion:
I can’t wait to send the grey away.
Not yet ready to let go of some semblance of my youth. It’s not “go grey” it’s “no grey.”