Having it all. Or not having it all.

September 28, 2016

(This is a companion to a post earlier this week.)

People come from a place of scarcity way too often, I think. That’s what I see, anyway.  They look around and think, well, they don’t have “enough.”  Not enough money, not enough love, not enough stuff, not enough house, not enough job, not enough, not enough, not enough — it must be tiresome to think that all the time. It has to be.

Not having it all. It’s almost a knee-jerk thing–we don’t think it through. We see what we think others have and we see our lives as lacking.

It’s not so simple.

What we don’t see is that most of the people who we think have it all didn’t have it easy. We walk in on a chapter and think it’s the whole story. Most of the time? It’s not.

Oh and doesn’t “enough” usually mean things or money?

I’m not sure who defined “enough” but too many people think they don’t fit the definition.

It’s definitely true that some of us have fallen on hard times. The risk is that we let those hard times define us.

Wouldn’t it be better to rise to the occasion and let our response define us instead?

I know a number of people who have made big changes in their lives as a result of circumstances: changes they wouldn’t have chosen.  But in rising to the occasion, they found that they not only have enough–they have more than enough.

They know the secret to having it all is knowing that they already do.

27 comments on “Having it all. Or not having it all.
  1. So very true, Carol. I am always more content when I focus on what I have instead of what is lacking. Gratitude definitely improves my perspective and I am truly blessed.

  2. Jennifer says:

    True. If we look at what we have and not at what we don’t have…we might find we have too much.

  3. Oh, so true. There’s a variation that goes something like: the secret to having what you want is wanting what you have. And that comes from a place of gratitude. The last thing I do at night is run through what I’m thankful for; it’s a nice way to fall asleep!

    • Barbara says:

      Gratitude can change everything. I start my day with a gratitude prayer. I never understood the ‘bigger, better, faster, more expensive…’ attitudes. Maybe you need to come from a place where there was very little to appreciate the simple things that make life great.

  4. shari Eberts says:

    You are right! Feeling gratitude for all that we do have is an important part of a happy life, but sometimes it is hard to remember to do it. Thanks for this important reminder.

  5. Linda Hobden says:

    So true what you said, that sometimes things happen that make you realise that you actually really do have more than enough. Food for thought… thank you.

  6. Leanne says:

    I work for some very wealthy people who on the surface look like they have it all – except their marriage is falling apart at the seams, the wife is completely lost and sad all the time and they are basically miserable. It’s been a very confronting lesson in not comparing and not assuming. Count your blessings and be grateful that we have all we need is a strong mantra in my world now days.

  7. Susan says:

    This is a good post to really think about! I agree with the concept that less is more. The older I get, the more I believe it.

  8. Brenda says:

    Well said, I am one of those who made life changes as the result of life-altering events. I wasn’t planning my changes nor prepared for the root cause. but we’re resilient. We endure and more often than not end up in a better place.

  9. becky says:

    “What we don’t see is that most of the people who we think have it all didn’t have it easy. We walk in on a chapter and think it’s the whole story”

    This comment really spoke to me! Great post!

  10. Anna Palmer says:

    I have been looking for bounty lately. And not just in the paper towel aisle. I already have enough. It is important to experience that plenty every day.

  11. Kim Tackett says:

    and you know, there are other ways to frame it too…having plenty, having enough, having time. I remember that line (often used for women who were looking for work life balance…) you can have it all, just not all at the same time. xo

  12. Laura says:

    Everyone has it all – they just have to look and see it. If you have your health and people who love you, you are very lucky.

  13. Christina says:

    I completely agree with this! We never put a value on stuff or money, preferring family togetherness and experiences. Although, look where that got us lol!

  14. Nellwyn says:

    So very true! I think social media plays a big part in making us feel like we don’t have enough… We see other people’s posts and feel inferior if we don’t have everything they do.

  15. It’s all about the gratitude.

  16. Amber Myers says:

    I like this. So long as my family and friends are happy, I feel like I do have enough.

  17. Anvita says:

    Good read. I am usually the kind of person who is content with what i have.However some friends who are always aspiring for more think it never makes me want to have more. I guess there are two sides of it.

  18. Glenda says:

    What a great topic! I couldn’t agree with you more… I’ve said the same things in the past and it is extremely tiresome because it is ALWAYS never not enough. To be honest I am looking forward to the day I can downsize on my house and get rid of some of my clutter. Less is definitely better!!!

  19. Having worked with the addicted, the abused, and the homeless, I have to say I may look at this from a different perspective. These people do not have enough and I try to share what I have with them whenever possible. Granted, those who are lucky enough to get a room for the night in a shelter before it’s full, are grateful. Those who have a vehicle to sleep in, or a refrigerator box to drag under a bridge for shelter, are grateful. I’ve pulled myself out of a couple of pretty unexpected turn of events but not everyone had the education or the ability to do so. Some have been so beaten down for so long, they can barely get up. Reach out. Pay it forward. You have no idea how grateful these folks will be and it just may change someone’s life.

  20. This is such a great post to think about. I love a similar saying which is “if you look at what you have in life, you’ll always have more. If you look at what you don’t have in life, you’ll never have enough.”

  21. Daniel says:

    If you look at celebrities that do have it all they are a mess.However, it is very hard to just not want what you can’t have even if you regret it.

  22. Good read, I enjoy the inspiration I get from your posts.

  23. Thanks for the great read today. I am always thankful for what we have, because I know I am more blessed than others who are struggling to survive. If we learn to embrace what we have, then we can truly feel happy and complete in our life.

  24. Lisa Rios says:

    Such a beautiful post and I agree very much with your views. Most of us tend to look in to the stories that happens around others and as a reason we forgot to accomplish what is needed to us! Thanks for inspiring!

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