She never stood a chance, little girl lost, daughter of the late Whitney Houston, gone now at only 22 years of age.
Bobbi Kristina never stood a chance.
Every time something like this happens, I wonder when Hollywood, the entertainment industry, celebrities will wake up to reality.
But they never do. Maybe they’re so venal they don’t care.
Let’s start with the beautiful and talented Whitney Houston. Oh, that powerhouse voice! Her anthems of the 1980s still stand the test of time and that voice, soaring to the heavens–perfection.
Everyone around her knew she had a drug problem. Even the public knew, thanks to exposes by the National Enquirer and that train wreck of a reality show called “Being Bobby Brown.” Whitney was only a tangential part of the show, which aired in 2005, but her small bits told the audience everything.
“Bahhbeeeee!” she’d call, obviously high on drugs, her hair askew, her movements jerky. It became a joke among viewers. “Bahbeeee!” the cry of a talented singer who was in the depths of misery.
Their daughter, Bobbi Kristina, was raised in that atmosphere. In fact, her parents smoked crack around her. Maybe worse. Their marriage was toxic.
These parents had no moral compass.
But then, Hollywood and the entertainment industry have always had trouble finding their moral compass. To smoke crack around a young girl? For shame.
Music impresario Clive Davis tried to convince Whitney Houston to get help. Repeatedly, even going so far as to stage an intervention, one of several she ignored. Here’s an excerpt from a letter Clive sent Whitney:
Whitney, our lives intertwined almost twenty years ago. You learned to trust me even when you had doubt, and professionally you soared with your God given talent and genius to all time heights. Now, I reach out personally and I ask you to trust me. I ask you to trust me in blind faith. You need help and it must begin now. I will stand by you with love and caring to see you through it to new found peace and happiness in every way as a woman, as a mother, as a role model to inspire the rest of the world. Love, Clive.
It had no effect. He’s said she was in complete denial about her drug use.
So what happened to Whitney? Why was this huge talent so troubled?
There’s plenty of evidence that Whitney was a closeted lesbian. She came up in a time when the closet door was still firmly shut for most celebrities. The closet, we know, can be suffocating.
Did having to live that lie contribute to her reliance on drugs? What is the cost of hiding who you are?
Coincidentally, Clive Davis was also pretty much in the closet at the time, coming out as bisexual only two years ago at the age of 82. Just that fact alone hints at how powerful a force the closet is.
So let’s count up the few factors we know:
Whitney was a drug addict.
Bobby was a drug addict.
They did drugs around Bobbi Kristina.
They modeled a marriage that was toxic.
Whitney never could quit drugs.
Whitney was probably living in the closet.
The stress of the closet could have contributed to her drug problem.
And now, Bobbi Kristina, dead, after being found in the bathtub, like her mother. A troubled relationship with her sort-of stepbrother/boyfriend/maybe husband.
The family asked for “privacy” during their initial time of grief.
As she lay in a hospital bed early-on, brain-dead but on life support, her father celebrated his 46th birthday with friends in a restaurant.
“It was a party atmosphere,” someone told the press. Brown was “lavished with presents.” There was a birthday cake and song.
As the family gathered at an Atlanta hotel to say what they thought were final goodbyes to Bobbi Kristina, Bobby Brown’s sister hit his cousin over the head with a bottle because he called her a crackhead.
Then, Bobby Brown decided to keep his comatose daughter alive for months, on some form of life support.
The entertainment industry has always been shallow and its moral center has always been absent. I have to wonder how many more (young) lives will be lost because of…because of what? the quest for fame? wealth? the problem of addiction? the unwise decision to have children?
All we can do is bless this poor young soul and pray that lessons will be learned.
Poor Bobbi Kristina, dead for lack of a moral compass.
Such a sad, sad tale.
Such an incredibly sad situation. They had many problems, but when drugs are involved–it becomes extremely hard to help people. It makes you feel helpless. Just so so sad for the children involved as they get drawn in without having a say in it.
I think there are some people in the entertainment business who maintain a moral compass, but it’s extremely difficult to do so when money, fame, and short-term relationships of being on the road are constant pressures. It’s so hard to be grounded in an environment that is constantly threatened by flattery, materialism, hedonism, and substance abuse. Some can hold up barriers against these assaults, but it’s seemingly very rare. May Bobbi Kristina’s soul find some peace. And may we do all we can to help ground people in places that have productive, peaceful, and healthy (physically, spiritually and emotionally) values.
What a sad but all too common story when you are raised in such a toxic atmosphere. What a life…
I just kept thinking this morning of poor Bobby Brown. Whatever people think or say about him – – I cannot imagine the pain of losing a child.
Bobbi Kristina’s story is just about the worst story of parental neglect and ignorance I’ve ever heard. But I don’t think it’s fair to lump all of Hollywood in with this family. There are plenty of big stars and celebrities who have normal families and don’t smoke crack around their kids. This kind of thing happens at all levels of society.
I agree with Sharon.
Bobby Brown is crazy and always has been.
Whitney—I don’t get what drove her to him. One time I can understand. We all make mistakes. But more than once—and keeping her daughter in his life, no no no.
Like you said—she didn’t stand a chance.
Toxic is the right word.
The deck was certainly stacked against her. Such a sad story, from all angles.
sadly so many people with demons think they can skirt the devil by having children- that a child will make it all better, only to pull them into the pit, as well.
I have no business replying to your blog right now because I am slammed with so much to do!! But I am compelled to. Over the last week I had the opportunity to meet with many, many amazing people. Captains of industry all. Yet to a man, kind and forthcoming. They understood they were blessed, they understood they had the best of it….but their concern was putting forth positive messages. One asked me my opinion on several social issues and I told him the freedom I felt from being able to say, “My job is to love, it is up to God to judge” He agreed and then said, it is the family isn’t it? When the family is destroyed nothing else matters….Parents need to be at their children’s crossroads….and alert parents will know where those crossroads are. I personally didn’t ask my children to do anything I didn’t ask myself to do. I felt drugs, alcohol and casual sex was not helpful for them. I asked them to be judicious in the movies they watched. So I followed those same guidelines. My children are all grown and making their own decisions now, but for that short time, and it is a very short time, i was careful and watchful. It was a great time, and I am glad I made those sacrifices. My mother and father were not monogamous, and my mother was an alcoholic, so that experience certainly weighed in. Love you for your candor. Very few folks want to take responsibility for their actions…sort of “do as I say not as I do” mentality. Actions speak much louder than words
It’s all just so very sad.
It’s such a waste of a lovely young woman. Like you said she never had a chance.
The more people I interview on my show the more I am realizing this girl and many like her did have a chance. My show is interviewing people from all over the orld who soared above unbelivable circumstances. They determined not to allow their abusive childhood or horrendous circumstances direct their lives. It was never easy but they succeeded. I applaud each one of them as most had worse situations than cited here. Howevver it is still terribly sad and hopefully will send a message
I’ve gotten so much from all of your comments today. Thank you for them all.
It’s sad, Carol. Her mum was one of my favorite singers. At least they can now meet in a better place.
Oh, this just makes me weep. For this poor little girl. For all of the lost children. I don’t know what the answer is. Less money? More responsibility? How do you keep a grasp on a moral compass that simply isn’t there. Has never been in your life. So sad.
I had no clue, what’s so great about Bobby Kristina. But then, when I read the newspaper about her death, the curiosity to know about the reason for her death rose a zillion in my mind. You have very well narrated the entire episode here.
Thanku. It is sad though. And we think, money and fame can bring us solace.