When I was in my 20s I’d go to bed at 11pm, fall asleep immediately and awaken refreshed at 7am. It’s a different story now.
It’s rare that I sleep through an entire night. No, I wake up halfway through the night with a million thoughts.
Like this one:
What was I thinking? The fabric I thought I wanted for the new family room sectional is way too light for the wear it will get. Back to the drawing board.”
Or this one:
Did the new window come with a screen? Do we have to order one?
And then this:
OMG. The new stove isn’t just a flat drop in. It has a small top section where the controls are. Why didn’t I notice that when I bought it?
Yeah. The middle of the night. Gotta love it.
And then there is this:
So NOT true. Sometimes I can’t even READ what I scrawl in the middle of the night.
Kind of like when I abbreviate on a shopping list these days. Ban. What did I mean? Is that Ban deodorant? We don’t use Ban. What is it? Ohhh….bananas.
Or when I am just too sleepy to wake up enough to write my pearls of wisdom down. I repeat them over and and over in my head to memorize them for morning. When I can only remember how brilliant the thought was, not the actual thought, itself.
The middle of the night can be anxiety-producing.
Now this is a daunting thought, because it means that I am in someone else’s dream every single night. Maybe the same person or maybe not. Who would that be? Do I even want to be there?
Yes, the middle of the night can be anxiety-producing.
What I love about my life now is that M. is that warmth in the middle of the night. No matter how restless I am, he’s always there for me. Of course he goes right back to sleep. Naturally.
So, inquiring: what happens to you in the middle of the night? What do you think? What do you do?