Miracles happen

October 11, 2012
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I woke up at 2am the other night and after tossing and turning for an hour, wrote this: 
 I’m tired of it. 
I don’t want to hear one more person’s cancer diagnosis. 
I don’t want to send another card to someone waiting for surgery.
I don’t want to watch them suffer as poison intended to kill the disease courses through their bloodstream making them feel like shit. 
I don’t want the details of her brave fight.
 I can’t bear the thought of her chronic pain, day in and day out, 
and the depression that comes with it. 
I don’t want to know his family’s been called in to say their goodbyes. 
I don’t want to hear that treatment isn’t working 
or see pictures of her wasting away from disease. 
Or that a grieving mother has been hospitalized. 
Don’t tell me that another young person has taken their own life. 
♥
 
It’s not happening to me but I am consumed
with feeling the agony of those around me who are battling for their lives. 
 It all comes back to me, that year I sat by my mother’s hospital bed 
as she suffered and then, finally, and mercifully, crossed over. 
I remember being so up close and personal that it hurt.
And it still hurts.
 Too much sadness. Too much pain. Too much grief. 
You wonder what keeps me up at night? 
This. This is what keeps me up. 
I don’t understand why these things have to happen 
and I am on empathy overload.
And then, a call this morning 
from someone who had to extend treatment 
when the latest round failed to knock the cancer out. 
“My numbers are NORMAL!” she said, laughing with joy. 
“Not borderline normal, really and truly and solidly NORMAL! 
This round of treatment is working!” 
My heart leaped with joy for this wonderful turn of events.
We laughed out loud.  I smiled ear to ear
and could see her smile through the phone lines.
It came at the perfect time, this reminder that sometimes,
the phone rings with good news.
That treatment can work.
 Shit happens.
But sometimes, miracles happen, too.
Thank you.
 
7 comments on “Miracles happen”
  1. Still Blonde after all these YEARS says:
    October 11, 2012 at 3:08 pm

    Yes, yes, they do. Amen for that. It’s good you can still see that. Beautiful piece and style.

    Reply
  2. Jennifer Comet Wagner says:
    October 11, 2012 at 4:02 pm

    Beautiful post!

    Reply
  3. Denise G says:
    October 12, 2012 at 1:43 am

    Yes they do! Sometimes they do happen….

    Reply
  4. Middle-aged Diva (Carol) says:
    October 12, 2012 at 1:56 am

    & thank goodness they do happen! 😉

    Reply
  5. Grace Hodgin says:
    October 12, 2012 at 3:29 am

    I agree that miracles happen. I enjoyed your post.

    Reply
  6. Kat @ Inspiration CAN be Found Everywhere says:
    October 12, 2012 at 1:57 pm

    Thank you for sharing. Yes it is a good thing that miracles happen, it reminds us that although there is still much work to be done, we are on the right path.

    I am happy to see that you are still able to see that, no matter how frustrated you become with what at times seems like the never ending stream of bad news.

    Reply
  7. Kelly says:
    October 12, 2012 at 3:45 pm

    I’m totally on empathy overload too!! thanks for sharing this. hope is a magical thing.

    Reply

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