We Catholics do not study the Bible.

I know that probably sounds strange to non-Catholics.

We learned our religion as children with something far simpler: The Baltimore Catechism.

It was made up of easy questions and answers that cut right to the chase without having to work through all that arcane language. It was Bible “Lite,” and I can’t help but wonder if we Catholics were smarter than Protestants about this or just too dumb to understand the actual Bible.

I don’t want to think too long on that.

As kids, we were expected to memorize our catechism and the nuns would drill us on it. As you can imagine, we didn’t dare be unprepared.

It wasn’t heavy lifting. For example, from Lesson #1:

1. Who made us?

  <p>God made us.</p>      <p><em>In the beginning, God created heaven and earth. (Genesis 1:1)</em></p>      <h3>2. Who is God?</h3>      <p>God is the Supreme Being, infinitely perfect, who made all things  and keeps them in existence.</p>      <p><em>In him we live and move and have our being. (Acts 17:28)</em></p>      <h3>3. Why did God make us?</h3>      <p>God made us to show forth His goodness and to share with us His  everlasting happiness in heaven.</p>      <p><em>Eye has not seen nor ear heard, nor has it entered into the  heart of man, what things God has prepared for those who love him. (I  Corinthians 2:9)</em></p>Except we didn't get the Biblical citation with the answer.<br /><br />I've tried to get through the New Testament a few times, but found it such a slog I tired of it rather quickly.  And the Old Testament? Too much smiting and smoting for someone who doesn't believe in an punishing God.<br /><br />So when I unpacked <span>The One Year Bible, New Living Translation</span>, I figured it might be time to try again.  I started the other night.<br /><br />I'm not sure we're supposed to laugh when reading the Bible, but there are passages in this contemporary language version of the New Testament that crack me up.  For example, from Isaiah:<br /><br /><span>Do you think I want all these sacrifices you keep offering to me? I have  had more than enough of the sheep you burn as sacrifices and of the fat  of your fine animals. I am tired of the blood of bulls and sheep and  goats.</span><sup>12</sup><span> Who asked you to  bring me all this when you come to worship me? Who asked you to do all  this tramping around in my Temple?</span><sup>13</sup><span><br /><br />It's useless to bring your offerings. I am  disgusted with the smell of the incense you burn. I cannot stand your  New Moon Festivals, your Sabbaths, and your religious gatherings; they  are all corrupted by your sins.</span><sup>14</sup><span>  I hate your New Moon Festivals and holy days; they are a burden that I  am tired of bearing.</span><br /><br />The only response that came to mind was "Yeah, and yo mama!"<br /><br />This translation has brought the Bible to life in ways I hadn't imagined and, not knowing what's ahead in this version,  I always look forward to my day's section.<br /><br /><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_HiqNq4An6Wc/S-LzbgSBegI/AAAAAAAAEgw/gMXAkP-8mgg/s1600/peace_love_understanding.jpg"><img src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_HiqNq4An6Wc/S-LzbgSBegI/AAAAAAAAEgw/gMXAkP-8mgg/s320/peace_love_understanding.jpg" alt="" border="0"/></a><br />Oh, and just so you know: I am not, nor will I ever be, a Biblical literalist. The Bible is allegorical teaching from a different time. Trying to interpret it literally in our contemporary world  is a slippery slope that leads to stoning and putting disobedient children to death, not to mention sleeping with the maid if your wife can't conceive.<br /><br />These are places you just don't want to go.<br /><br />But the other messages, those of peace, love and understanding, should be taken literally and never go out of date.