Why I looked for a therapist

October 21, 2022

Empty chair.

I’ve been struggling, have you noticed? With everything.

The state of the world. The losses I’ve experienced. My own world view. If you’ve been reading along, you may have noticed.

I let it go a long time. And then, I started feeling blue.

THAT was different. I’m not a depressive.

Finally, I decided to find a therapist. My past forays into therapy have been helpful and I know a little something about how to screen them. This time, I screened also for Covid policy, vaccination status and masking. Oh, and also to make sure they were not Trump supporters, because if they were I’d know they lacked critical thinking skills. Would not want someone like that treating me.

The first therapist who called back clicked, at least on the phone call, and I’ve got an appointment for very soon. Once I took that step, I felt a great weight had lifted. All things looked brighter.

As someone who works in grief, I do know how insidious it can be. And when she described to me a Gestalt technique she often used, the empty chair, I felt tears gather. I’d done it before so I know its power.

So much loss in my life and not only through death. I knew I needed the empty chair and many people would be seated there. Too many for me to handle alone.

When you’re someone who’s always been expert at holding it all together, and at managing alone, there is great release in being able to let all that out to a third party. An uninvolved but professional third person.

So yes, I’m looking forward to my first session and hope the promise I feel today pays out.

Because no matter how much loss in our life, none of us is an island. We all need an outlet.

Wish me luck.
If you’re dealing with grief and loss, see my gentle and supportive tools right HERE

19 comments on “Why I looked for a therapist
  1. Lynda Beth Unkeless says:

    Dear Carol,

    It’s a sign of strength to ask for help!

    Wishing you relief, release,
    and letting go!

  2. Wishing you insights and equanimity, Carol, after this wise move.

  3. Amazing that the first therapist clicked, I’ve found it takes a lot of frog kissing to find the right fit.

    • Well, on the phone it clicked. We shall see what in person is like…because yep, frog kissing. But also I am a good screener. I know what I am looking for. I did see one tiny red flag and have thought about how to handle it.

  4. Laurie Stone says:

    I think it’s a wonderful idea. I saw a therapist years ago and have been thinking of seeing her again. It never hurts to talk it out.

  5. Alana says:

    I’ve been through therapy also, and I know the power of a good therapist. Wishing you a good match and productive sessions.

  6. Jennifer says:

    I think all therapists, or at least the very good ones, have their own therapy. You don’t just hold your stuff but you also take it in from others and there needs to be an outlet.

  7. Rena says:

    I’ve been on the waitlist for a therapist for almost a year. Different states prioritize mental health differently and unfortunately when you live in a red state those resources are sorely lacking. I’ve never been but I am hopeful.

  8. Making the decision is powerful, my friend…you’re on your way…

  9. I hope it works for you, Carol. And I love your screening process.

  10. Meryl says:

    None of us is an island…so true. It takes courage to reach out. Thank you.

1 Pings/Trackbacks for "Why I looked for a therapist"
  1. […] Aging is no territory for sissies. The senior years can be challenging. So when Carol Cassara of Carol A. Cassara Writer found herself unusually blue, she decided to unpack what’s going on with a therapist. She’s sharing it on her blog this week in “Why I Looked for a Therapist.” […]

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