I love this.

It’s always puzzled me when people who split up suddenly hate
their former partner.
The person they once loved.

My take on it’s always been this: if we thought enough of them once to love them, they didn’t suddenly become the devil. That spark that connected us is still there.
It’s always there.

A relationship disintegrates because of both people.
When we blame and demonize our former partner, it’s a sign that we’re not willing to face our own role in the relationship’s demise.

We’re afraid of what that might tell us about ourselves.

The secret is that we can face our flaws and weaknesses
and still emerge with self-esteem intact.
As long as we remember to also acknowledge our strengths in the relationship.

When we think lovingly of those we were once involved with
we honor not only that love, but ourselves.

We show greater understanding of the relationship and of ourselves.
And we prepare ourselves for a new, healthier relationship to come.

Sometimes, two people just can’t be together for an entire lifetime.
For whatever reason.

Many people are surprised that I have always maintained
cordial, loving relationships with the men I’ve loved.

I’m always surprised when people don’t.

{Thank you, Oriah, for this reminder.}