What you teach every day

October 16, 2017


Kids are watching. Maybe they aren’t listening, but that are watching. What you teach reaches them by what you do.

Do you teach love?

Do you teach acceptance of others’ differences?

Do you teach judgment, that your way is the only way?

Do you make fun of others?

Do you call names?

Do you bait others with nasty comments?

Do you show rage?

Are you a sourpuss?

Or do you inspire and encourage others?

Do you model generous behavior by giving of yourself in whatever way you can?

We make this a better world one by one, each of us doing our part to help others. To think of the bigger picture. To accept those who are different. To keep our commentary civil.

And the biggest gift of all is to give of ourselves.

I saw that firsthand when I sat with my mother for the better part of her final year on earth. Being there and giving what I could–laughs, support, conversation–was the most important thing I did that year. I saw it again 20 years later when I spent years supporting a friend in her final illnesses.

And that’s why I founded A Healing Spirit: to provide ways people can support their loved ones who are healing or grieving. There is no more important role we can play in the world.

I’d love to know what you’ve done to help others, too. In the Comments below, say a few words about what you teach by what you do–who knows, you might inspire someone else to do the same!




33 comments on “What you teach every day
  1. I have always tried to teach my kids to be kind, to stand up for themselves and others, and to be resilient. I know that they’ve learned more from watching what I do way more than from listening to what I say. You HAVE TO be a role model.

  2. robin rue says:

    I always try to model behaviors for my kids. I think it’s best for them to learn when they see me acting out a certain way.

  3. This is something that every person and every parent should read, reread, and then read again. We teach everyone around us how to approach the world, especially our kids.

  4. So right, Carol. Kids must grow up independent as far as feasible, so that when they eventually venture into that big scary world on their own, they know they can do it. They don’t have to depend on Mommy for everything. A look at embossing folders- #5 in ProBlogger Challenge

  5. Ellen Dolgen says:

    So true! I think we teach my example. You know what they say, kids are not born bigoted. They learn that.

  6. Hi Carol! I so believe this. Kids are ALWAYS watching what is going on and they learn by the examples they see around them. Let’s do our best to be a good example. ~Kathy

  7. This is really beautiful, thanks for sharing. I agree it’s so important to lead by example, whether it’s teaching your peers, your partner, your kids…we can do so much by teaching through action and kindness.

  8. Marcie W. says:

    I could certainly stand to be more conscious of the life I lead and the example I set. I tend to have a bad temper and a short fuse, both things I want to work on, and appreciate this much needed reminder.

  9. Liz Mays says:

    It really is important to think about the way we behave towards others. It can be troubling when we notice children mimicking some of our own bad behaviors.

  10. This is wonderful, Carol, and something that’s been on my mind so very much of late. We all are being watched by SOMEone, someone to whom our words and actions make a difference (for better or for worse) and define who we are far more than our own descriptions of ourselves do.

  11. Let’s address the monkey in the room It’s sad that our so-called leader does all of the above.(except for inspiring and encouraging others) I just had to say it. LOL

  12. Pam Wattenbarger says:

    It is so important to try and always be kind to other people. You never know what they are going through.

  13. Shell says:

    Kids pay so much attention to what we actually do, more than what we just say. Thanks for the reminder!

  14. I grew up in a pretty negative household where everyone always gossiped and talk about each other behind their back. Now, with my own family, I have finally realized that I cannot be that way. I will catch myself complaining about someone, and I remind myself that my sons are taking that in and learning the same negativity so I keep my mouth shut. It doesn’t help anyone, and I don’t want my kids to grow up thinking that is ok.

  15. Our Family World says:

    My kids are past the impressionable age and I hope I did my best to be a good role model for them. It sure requires a lot of patience and sacrifice as parents, but eventually, it will be for the benefit of the kids. Thanks for the reminder.

  16. brianne says:

    I always remind myself that what comes out of my mouth my kids are listening to. I try to teach kinds daily.

  17. Kids are definitely watching, that’s why it’s important to make sure that we’re careful with our words and our actions. I think this is a wonderful reminder for all of us, an eye opener of sorts.

  18. That’s a lovely thought, it’s good to analyze our actions and think about how much we’ve done to help others, especially friends and family. And what our kids have been learning about us. I like to make sure that I teach them about compassion.

  19. It doesn’t stop with little kids either Carol – I think we continue to model behaviour to our adult kids too – they see how we walk our talk and what we value and how we live out those values and that reinforces so many of the little lessons we passed on when they were young. I’ve just started the 30 days of no complaining challenge – hopefully I’ll make it through because it’s showing me the importance of turning my thoughts from negative to positive ones – another great thing to model to others!

  20. Wendy Polisi says:

    I use to call names. Someone I have worked with for a long time started using my habits and I really regret how I used to act.

  21. Michael says:

    Definitely doesn’t stop w/kids is right! I try to stay super positive and optimistic all the time 🙂

  22. Annemarie LeBlanc says:

    Great reminder for parents with very young kids. This reminded me of the poem, “Children Learn What they Live” by Dorothy Law Nolte. It is for the best interest of the child that we, as parents be their first role models, and that the home be where they learn morals and values.

  23. Krysti says:

    It’s so true and important to be mindful of how you are around children. I wish more people were!

  24. Rosey says:

    Finding the time to give of ourselves really does matter. We take time out to help others, and in the end, we benefit the most.

  25. Kids definitely pay attention to more of what you do than what you say. I never quite understood the saying, “Do what I say and not what I do.”

  26. I try always to be kind and understanding so I do not judge. What we see in the outside many times is not what the person is like inside.

  27. Kids nowadays are way more intelligent than we were when we were their age, they observe elderly’s actions and imitate them. So whatever we teach them should also reflect in our actions!

  28. We always have to resort to conscious living. We have to be aware that our behaviors have an an impact on or affect others especially children.It is like children are apprenticed to of our lifestyle. Therefore we have live to consciously aware of this and let this knowledge inform our choice of actions.

  29. As parent, I teach my kids by good example. Be kind,show empathy, be modest, caring and to be happy are some of the traits I want to instill in them.

  30. Candy Rachelle says:

    These are so very true! I’ve always said that kids watch all that we do and say. The POTUS didn’t learn this. This is why it is important for US as parents to be mindful of this so that our kids will have US to look up to and emulate.

  31. I think every day I have to think about what I do because I have a daughter who watches me all the time. That makes me always worry about the words I say or the things I do in front of. her. She needs a good role model of who men are.

  32. Everyone should read this. If more people were kind and had kindness in their hearts I think people would get along much better.

  33. Jake Ferrer says:

    Nice post to read. I remember my mom always say, “It’s better to give than to receive.” I may say she’s a very strong woman with a big heart.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


Follow Carol


Here you’ll find my blog, some of my essays, published writing, and my solo performances. There’s also a link to my Etsy shop for healing and grief tools offered through A Healing Spirit.


I love comments, so if something resonates with you in any way, don’t hesitate to leave a comment on my blog. Thank you for stopping by–oh, and why not subscribe so you don’t miss a single post?


Subscribe to my Blog

Receive notifications of my new blog posts directly to your email.