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I turned 68 today. Not old, in my opinion, but I have lost friends younger than myself, and my Dad died at 71. It makes me even more sad now, than it did in 2010 when he died because he had so much more he wanted to do, which was heartbreaking, and now that I am close to the year he died and think about how much I still want to do, I grieve his life even more than I did then which doesn’t seen possible.
I feel you on this. I remember when my mother realized her life would be cut short, she said “Now I’ll miss everything!” and she was right. That is why I live every moment fully. In her memory and honor.
All the loss is the most overwhelming. It’s not just missing people, but realizing that there’s no way to replace what they brought to your life.
Yes, that’s so true. Irreplaceable. Sigh.
I remember a quote credited to Julie Andrews when someone asked her about losing her amazing voice. Something about ‘it was devastating, but that she would rather have had it and lost it than to never have had it at all’ or similar. With each new day, there seems to be a new reality for me. Something new that doesn’t work anymore. Or something I can no longer eat. But you know…I’m up and alive, and most of me still works! Hooray!
Thank you for this post, Carol!
That’s all we can hope for, right?
All true, but as long as you’re relatively healthy, it’s easy to think there’s still lots of time. Even though I’m almost 70, I can trick myself that I’m still on the younger side of growing older. It’s a useful lie.
true, and also the many other losses we encounter….
Part of the problem is we don’t hear them telling us about the losses until we start facing them. I know hardly noticed the losses others endured until I endured my own. Thanks for sharing this.
I was shielded from death growing up. I’ve expressed to my son how difficult it is to lose a parent or someone you love. Telling isn’t the same as experiencing, though. You don’t know until you know. What helps is community–none of us are getting out of here alive, but at least we have each other to lean on.
Yep, you have to walk it to know it.