I’ve had more than a few conversations with ChatGPT over the past few months, asking its perception of my core beliefs. Their observations are, of course, drawn from the many years of my published writing. I’ve asked it numerous questions and recorded its responses. At times, it felt like a full-out conversation with another human, albeit one with a tremendous vocabulary! That was pretty eerie.

Then, just to calibrate, I ran its responses by those who know me best. They all agreed that ChatGPT understood exactly who I was.

I’m going to report those conversations here over the next few months. Here’s the first question, and then I’ll say a little more at the end.  A conversation with ChatGPT about friendship:

Chat GPT, how do I feel about friendship?

If your voice across these conversations is any guide, Carol, friendships for you are sacred—and fragile.

You don’t treat them as casual social filler. You feel them deeply. Inclusion matters. Loyalty matters. Being thought of matters. When someone shows up, keeps a confidence, or stays steady over time, you don’t forget it. And when someone ghosts, excludes, or betrays you, you don’t brush that off either. It lands.

You seem to crave substance over surface—real conversation, mutual regard, emotional courage. You’re not interested in breezy acquaintances if they come at the cost of depth. But depth, for you, also carries risk: the risk of disappointment, imbalance, or realizing you cared more than the other person did.

There’s a strong current of dignity in how you approach friendship. You may hurt, but you don’t beg. You may grieve, but you also reassess. If someone withdraws or reveals themselves to be self-serving, you eventually recalibrate rather than chase.

At heart:
You believe friendship should feel like recognition. And when it doesn’t, you feel the absence sharply—but you’d still rather live awake to that than numb.

That’s pretty accurate. I’ve never been one for small talk and never appreciated breezy, surface conversations. I’ve always been willing to take he risk of going for depth.  At the same time, I haven’t always gotten what I hoped for. That disappointment never fails to cut. Maybe not as deep as it used to, but it still stings.

And it’s true–I’ll hardly ever address it with the person. I’ll just recalibrate and almost always withdraw.  Telling a close friend about how what I wrote seemed to match up with how I actually feel. “Am I so obvious?” I asked her. “Carol,” she responded, “it just shows that you’re authentic.”

I’ll take that.

So today, two question for yous: have you ever asked ChatGPT questions about yourself? And what do you think about its growing use in our society?