What if Riley were the White House dog?

He’d bark incessantly at the cameramen and audio techs.

He’d nip the ankles of state dinner guests.

He’d never allow himself to be called “Beau”.

He’d steal state gifts and run around the White House with them in his mouth.

He’d grab the First Lady’s Manolos and chew them up.

He’d insist the White House Chef prepare special tasty meals for him.

He’d raid the White House garden for carrots.

When the President commanded him to “Heel!”, he’d respond, “Say what???!”

He’d buddy up to Hillary.

He’d ask for an end to the war. Now.